Quotable Posts

If you spot any articles in any of the skating newsgroups that might fit in this section, feel free to send it my way. Here's a few that I thought belonged in here. Enjoy!

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From: cirby@magicnet.net (Chad Irby)
Newsgroup: rec.sport.skating.inline
Subject: Re: How to warn pedestrians?
Date: Thu, 01 Aug 1996 01:15:02

[discussion of how to warn pedestrians]

I'll happily bail off the track in order to miss small children. It's just too hard to clean them out of the frames when they get caught between my wheels.

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From: mugwump@magicnet.net (Bill Smith)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.skating.inline
Subject: Subject: Re: How to warn pedestrians?
Date: Sat, 03 Aug 1996 19:43:49

I have to tell somebody this... it's just too funny. I was skating along the other day, pretty much at my top speed, when I notice this family sitting on a bench up ahead.

As I approach, the woman jumps off the bench and starts moving toward me... I'm wondering if she's psycho, going to rob me, if they need help, maybe she's horny... under the circumstances, all I can do is expect some kind of intense confrontation. I'm at my most wary, trying to be ready for whatever is about to happen.

About ten feet away from her, I notice a sheaf of pamphlets in her hand. Then she's trying to run along beside me, dress flapping in the wind, yelling for me to take the literature home with me and read it. As she lost her balance and began to fall (running in her dress and sensible low heels), I realized that this was apparently some new crusade to recruit members for her church. No wonder she looked so sweaty and tired.

I started laughing so hard I nearly crashed.

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From: lylemcd@edge.edge.net (Lyle McDonald)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.skating.inline
Subject: Subject: Re: How to warn pedestrians?
Date: Sun, 04 Aug 1996 13:06:52

I've found that screaming "No brakes!" works quite well for getting people out of your way.

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From: kimon@iat.com (Kimon Papahadjopoulos)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.skating.racing
Subject: Burger caught with pants down, wins race
Date: Mon, 05 Jun 1995 16:09:33 -0700

Last Saturday and the Sears Point international raceway, Mike's Bikes team member Dan Burger was releaving himself in a in one of a row of port-a-potties across the road and over a small wall from the starting line, thinking that the citizen's class race was about to start.

He was unaware that all the elite racers had already gathered at the line, and moments later the starting gun sounded. Dan's teamate Sandy Snakenburg yelled at the port-a-potties as he rolled by "Hey Dan! The race is starting!". The third port-a-potty in the line started shaking violently. Several moments later a flustered Dan Burger burst through the door, leaped the low wall between him and the track and started desperately racing after the pack.

Dan won the race by more than 30 seconds.

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From: richards_peter_w@tandem.com (Peter W. Richards)
Subject: Quote of the week...
Date: Mon, 25 Jul 1994 19:31:30 GMT

...while registering for the Berkeley Criterium Bike/Skate: "You guys must be skaters; you're *hairy*..."

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From: Quincy Dee Brown 
Newsgroups: rec.sport.skating.inline
Subject: Re: A Bad feel About it
Date: Wed, 17 Apr 1996 15:39:14 -0500

A couple of days ago, just for fun, while at Target, I tried on a cheap pair of UltraWheel Skate Attacks.

They had precision bearings, buckle enclosure system and cheap wheels. Those were the worst things in the world, and I find it hard to believe beginners buy things like that to start out on.

While I was attempting to soul the store's display rack, some kids and their parent's came to purchase some 'Rollerblades.' I wanted to take them aside and tell them to leave, but that would be wierd.

It's sorta sad to think that so many people get into these cheapo's that aren't worth $30.

I was surprised to see some UltraWheels with good bearings, and a DBS braking system going for $99. There should have been a sign saying "If your going to waste your money, waste it on these."

I was going try them out, but one of the sporting dudes came over and watch me with a look of displeasure. Those silly racks can make some noise when you land on them. I figured he would get pissed if I stayed any longer, and really pissed if I tried on another pair.